Sex Tip of the Week: Fun Sex

The bedroom is boring. Make matters worse if you insist lights off. A lover without indiscretion is no lover at all, someone quipped. I am for this. I have an open mind, and not afraid. I want a man who is so.

I love the outdoors, very much. Not because I am desi girl naturally and I aggrandize the perfumed garden of the Kama Sutra. I have not even watched the Kama Sutra, but I have read the book, crammed it like a Muslim girl attending madrassa.

And then there is the hotel. And please, it’s not the dingy ones where the shower trickles like tears, and the bed is noisier than a locomotive. Even though it is said it’s a public place, take me in the elevator on that ride up to our room.

Well, something else I like very much is sex in the office. Not the me-the-secretary-and-you-the-boss thing. That’s unprofessional, and for me office romance is a no-no. It’s the other way round. I will surprise you in your office and demand you give it to me there and then. Don’t be afraid to storm into my office and ask nicely to unfurl the petal that’s my pussy.

Who cares whether I still behave like a teenager at thirty. I am a bachelorette. I fuck wherever I want whenever I feel like. So, sex in the car; make it more tantalizing on the hood – I will squirt all over you like a fountain.

I always dream of having a pleasure cruise. That’s after my childhood sweetheart failed miserably to take me on the stern of my father’s boat as my twenty-third birthday present. He was afraid that the boat might capsize. The idiot did not know that if he died inside my palpitating pussy it was one-way ticket to heaven. I still crave that.